Z-train Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 Johnstown, PA (BNSE): Local and state police scoured the hills outside rural Johnstown, Pennsylvania, after reports of three animal rights activists going missing after attempting to protest the wearing of leather at a large motorcycle gang rally this weekend. Two others, previously reported missing, were discovered by fast food workers "duct taped inside several fast food restaurant dumpsters," according to police officials. "Something just went wrong," said a still visibly shaken organizer of the protest. "Something just went horribly, horribly, wrong." The organizer said a group of concerned animal rights activist groups, "growing tired of throwing fake blood and shouting profanities at older women wearing leather or fur coats," decided to protest the annual motorcycle club event "in a hope to show them our outrage at their wanton use of leather in their clothing and motor bike seats." "In fact," said the organizer. "Motorcycle gangs are one of the biggest abusers of wearing leather, and we decided it was high time that we let them know that we disagree with them using it... Ergo, they should stop." According to witnesses, protesters arrived at the event in a vintage 1960's era Volkswagen van and began to pelt the gang members with balloons filled with red colored water, simulating blood, and shouting "you're murderers" to passers by. This, evidently, is when the brouhaha began. "They peed on me!!!" charged one activist. "They grabbed me, said I looked like I was French, started calling me 'La Trene', and duct taped me to a tree so they could pee on me all day!" "I... I was trying to show my outrage at a man with a heavy leather jacket. And, he... he didn't even care. I called him a murderer, and all he said was, 'You can't prove that.' Next thing I know is he forced me to ride on the back of his motorcycle all day, and not left me off, because his girl friend was out of town and I was almost a woman." Still others claimed they were forced to eat hamburgers and hot dogs under duress. Those who resisted were allegedly held down while several bikers "farted on their heads." Police officials declined comments on any leads or arrests due to the ongoing nature of the investigation, however, organizers for the motorcycle club rally expressed "surprise" at the allegations. "That's preposterous," said on high ranking member of the biker organizing committee. "We were having a party, and these people showed up and were very rude to us. They threw things at us, called us names, and tried to ruin the entire event. So, what did we do? We invited them to the party! What could be more friendly than that? You know, just because we are all members of motorcycle clubs does not mean we do not care about inclusiveness. Personally, I think it shows a lack of character for them to be saying such nasty things about us after we bent over backwards to make them feel welcome." When confronted with the allegations of force feeding the activists meat, using them as ad hoc latrines, leaving them incapacitated in fast food restaurant dumpsters, and 'farting on their heads,' the organizer declined to comment in detail. "That's just our secret handshake," assured the organizer. __________________ Quote Link to comment
ariascarlos1990 Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 HAHH! Fart on there hands? thats just weird. lol. Quote Link to comment
Skib Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 hahahahahaha :rofl: Quote Link to comment
paradoxx Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 sometimes I just find hilarious these type of "green" people..........they just follow the wave. Quote Link to comment
]2eDeYe Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 "That's just our secret handshake," assured the organizer. __________________ hahahahahaha Quote Link to comment
freekwonder Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 This had to come from the onion. But I don't care I love it. Quote Link to comment
Skib Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 sometimes I just find hilarious these type of "green" people..........they just follow the wave. going to art school in Portland meant I ran into a lot of these types, at first I just ignored them and there advances to hand out fliers and collect "donations". finally ended up making a scene on the street and almost laying one out, fuck off hippy, thats my money and Im keeping it :angry: "fuck-a you dolphin!! and fuck-a you whale!!" Quote Link to comment
stevensonDNL Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 Now Z-Train, who is the author of this charming, entertaining bit of news? You, maybe? Love the picture! Dan Quote Link to comment
hang_510 Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 fuckin' awesome! i thought it was gonna be from cannabalism. :( "fuck-a you dolphin!! and fuck-a you whale!!" still gotta respect the ocean! :fu: Quote Link to comment
hang_510 Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 HAHH! Fart on there hands? thats just weird. lol. HEADS! hands would be very weird. probably affects their secret handshake... you obviously dont have siblings. Quote Link to comment
72240z Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 HEADS! hands would be very weird. probably affects their secret handshake... you obviously dont have siblings. Ya seriously, charley horses and farts. :lol: Remember "knocked up" they all give each other pink eye farting on each others pillows lol. Quote Link to comment
datzenmike Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 Now Z-Train, who is the author of this charming, entertaining bit of news? You, maybe? Love the picture! Dan "I... I was trying to show my outrage at a man with a heavy leather jacket. And, he... he didn't even care. I called him a murderer, and all he said was, 'You can't prove that.' Next thing I know is he forced me to ride on the back of his motorcycle all day, and not left me off, because his girl friend was out of town and I was almost a woman." "almost a woman" ???? Wahahahaha who made this shit up??? Besides the biker's didn't murder any cows. That leather would just be thrown away after the meat was taken out of it if they didn't wear it. 'kin bull shit story! PETA this!!! (funny though) Quote Link to comment
ariascarlos1990 Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 HEADS! hands would be very weird. probably affects their secret handshake... you obviously dont have siblings. Whatever. I meant heads. and I do have siblings we never did that though. hahh:rofl: Quote Link to comment
FoxyRoadster Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 Haha, peta got what they deserved. They seem to leave me be, I think its the accent edit: I cant seem to find the original story, just a buncha forum post. Quote Link to comment
paradoxx Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 HEADS! hands would be very weird. probably affects their secret handshake... you obviously dont have siblings. that remembered me the handshake butt of the movie mall rats, "the stink will last forever" Quote Link to comment
bonvo Posted January 14, 2010 Report Share Posted January 14, 2010 after reading this all i can say is this. if its real, how the hell did they not see this comming? are the peta people really that stupid? your starting shit with bikers come one you had to expect this Quote Link to comment
fastdadd Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 it is fake but i still love it http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s2i66233 Quote Link to comment
FujiyamaMama Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 I love animals, I love my pets and I love the way animals taste.... :lol: Damn straight!!!! Quote Link to comment
FujiyamaMama Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 I am a PETA member, you know People Eating Tasty Animals Quote Link to comment
Guest kamakazi620 Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 And I like turning PETA members into....I mean onto My Fried Chicken mommy why does the chicken have fingers??? Quote Link to comment
gokiburix Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 this is supposed to make me vegetarian!!?!??! YAH RIGHT!!! ...it only makes me hungrier! :devil: Quote Link to comment
sick620 Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 this is supposed to make me vegetarian!!?!??! YAH RIGHT!!! ...it only makes me hungrier! :devil: I would goble that up Quote Link to comment
hang_510 Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 your starting shit with bikers come one you had to expect this guess oakland woulda been a better place to attempt the demonstration :lol: Quote Link to comment
Skib Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 when I eat my steak, I like to envision it with a soul........ fuck you peta :fu: Quote Link to comment
I'm BLUE Posted January 15, 2010 Report Share Posted January 15, 2010 when I eat my steak, I like to envision it with a soul........ fuck you peta :fu: :rofl: Don't Forget the A1 ( of course great cuts never needs sauce :thumbup: ) Quote Link to comment
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