HRH Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 That's assuming you're searching for Valhalla. If you're like me, you're rooting for reincarnation. I'm going to be a bear/shark/pig/doberman! Link to comment
RatVonDude Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 I want to be reincarnated as a rich Italian kid and then die at age 27 saving a school bus from disaster 1 Link to comment
Burabuda Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 the true valhalla is in the philipines Link to comment
paradime Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Here's the rub though, what off ramp do you take to be successfully reincarnated? From my limited perspective it looks like god is playing a game of 3000 card monty with my salvation. I have to choose from butt plugs like JWs of Mormons? I've never done well in Vegas, so I don't stand a chance in hell. The odds aren't in your favor when it come to religion, Fools game. Link to comment
datzenmike Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Saving souls... actually the oldest pyramid scheme. Lets see... if you wanted to start a new religion a couple of thousand years ago you'd.... Gain as many members as possible Enforce family values so there is the most chance of successful family. More kids= more members Birth control an absolute sin. More kids= more members Outlaw homosexuality. No kids no new members Recruit new members through proselytizing. Keep members you have Make extravagant promises that you never have to make good on. Like life after death. Encourage extravagant rituals and religious holidays. Pomp and ceremony Have as many idols as possible to keep your religion always near at hand and visible to members so they don't forget.. Encourage sainthood. Oppress all other religions Outlaw other religions encourage 'holy' wars. Your religion is the only 'true' religion. Don't work for, or deal with, or marry outside your religion Link to comment
smoke Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 At this point, it does not seem as if it's in my best interest to believe. Link to comment
paradime Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Make your own belief. Buy into someone else's story and your sure to be disappointed. Link to comment
smoke Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Church of the latter day sharks 1 Link to comment
smoke Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 No, wait, sharkvian orthodox. 1 Link to comment
HRH Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Holy crap, I'm a sharkvian orthodox too! Who would have thought?! :D Link to comment
paradime Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Great white sharks at that. If you want to hang with god on planet Kolob you got to be white. Link to comment
HRH Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 I have a better idea, I'm starting a religion and it's all revolving around Datsuns. I need a couple grand to get started, could you all send me money to make sure you worship in the correct fashion? Link to comment
q-tip Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 All of the religions are going to be pretty surprised when they find out they've been worshiping aliens...... .....and not the illegal kind. Link to comment
HRH Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 So you're a scientologist then? :rofl: Link to comment
q-tip Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Ancient astronaut theorist. :lol: 1 Link to comment
paradime Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 That dude smokes the kind bud. I'm sure he could do an episode of ancient aliens on the archived car parts in my garage. Link to comment
RatVonDude Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 or just spend your life in vain trying to convince people your Datsun is an Alpha Romeo, they might let you into heaven for your efforts where you can roller blade all you want. Link to comment
paradime Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Here's where I send my money. 1 Link to comment
q-tip Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 That dude smokes the kind bud. I'm sure he could do an episode of ancient aliens on the archived car parts in my garage. Say what you may, but it takes a special kind of guy to have that hair and wear a velvet suit. :lol: Link to comment
RatVonDude Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 this might help with some of the questions we have been asking Link to comment
Chuck Most Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Sharktology... http://seaorgforever.wordpress.com/2013/05/15/16/ Link to comment
paradime Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 this might help with some of the questions we have been asking I keep my dirty sox in a 4D tesserac, but I was told there'd be no math. 1 Link to comment
HRH Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 It's coming right for us!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nt6kKhlX8vU Link to comment
angliagt Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 Sadly,I think that many of you have your opinions inflenced by "Sunday Christians", & not people yoy parctice what they preach. I feel truely sorry for you,if this what you base your opinions on. Please feel free to judge the Muslim faith by the same standards.Of course,we can't do that, without being "Infidels",& killed,if we don't agree with them. - Doug Link to comment
Burabuda Posted November 30, 2014 Report Share Posted November 30, 2014 holy shit pastor gas is a real person! Link to comment
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